Personal/Real Relationships

In a previous post, we talked about fictional relationships, so I thought we could touch on real relationships as well. Relationships are everywhere within your short life, so much so, that you may not realize you even have some. As you go about your day, you’re creating them, nurturing them, building them up and in some cases breaking them down or losing them. The relationships you have with others are what make us who we are. It’s what connects us to those around us.

Types of Relationships

As you go throughout your day, you connect with people on many levels and in different ways. Each unique in its own way. Let’s take a look at a few.

Romantic

Those of a deeper level than any other; this is where trust, love, and commitment are at their highest (or at least it should be.) Relationships in this category are those that are built on respect, and evolve as each grows within the relationship. They cherish each other and build each other up as they grow beside one another.

Romantic relationships should be nurtured. You as a couple should talk about what you want out of the relationship and what each expects of each other. You both have differences and believe me, those differences are going to clash, but talking things out before or early within the relationship will help you get an understanding of what each other feels is important in your relationship and as an individual.

Family

This relationship is on a level just as deep as the above, but in a different way. There is still trust, love, and commitment to each other within this relationship. Your family is there for you no matter what. The dedication to each other through anything even when angry, upset or holding a stupid grudge. If you need something, they will be the first to respond without question.

This is a bond built on years of parent/sibling dedication, support, and so much more. Nothing should come between you and those within your family.

Friends

Next in line is the connection we have to those we spend our free time with. We talk with them about things going on and trust their advice. They may be the first we go to for help, and our real friends are like family.

They’ll drop everything to help when the need arrises, support you when you need it and give you the truth, even when it hurts. Thats why we love them so much.

Work/Business

In this category are those that we work with. Now some may be friends and you’ll spend time with them outside of the work arena, but most are those you see only when you work and nothing more.

You get along with some, but not others and this relationship is there to benefit both since neither wants to lose their job because of something ridiculous. You tough out the bad days and enjoy the good ones. (Unless they drive you to leave, then you get to start new work relationships!)

Acquaintances

Those you see occasionally, such as the store clerk that scans your groceries or church members. Of course some of these could also become friends, but you get what I mean.

These are those you see occasionally and don’t usually spend a lot of time with. Once or twice a week you gather and only because you have another reason for being around them.

You’re polite and nice, and when the event is over, everyone goes their separate ways.

Run-Ins

Now here is something you may not realize, but these are those that you have the smallest amount of contact with. Those you walk by on the streets, but may not even talk to.

Yes, your relationship with them may be short lived, but it’s a relationship none-the-less and can impact them or they can impact you in a monumental way. Remember a smile or a helping hand can go a long way!

What Makes a Great Relationship

Great relationships, no matter what type, take time and energy to keep functioning as they should. Below is a list of qualities needed to make a relationship great.

This is in no way all of the items we need, but they are the more important ones (in no particular order).

Commitment

In any relationship, a commitment is made to provide certain attributes of yourself. You dedicate your time, your skills, jokes, or anything else that will create a deeper connection to the ones you are in a relationship with.

This goes both ways, it’s something we expect as humans from those in a relationship with us as well as us with them.

Compromise

Though each involved should compromise when ideas aren’t the same. You should also find a way to work out how each of you can do the things you love to do.

You shouldn’t have to give up those activities you love to please someone else. They should be happy you’re doing what you love as you should be happy they are doing what they love.

This goes for things around the house as well or any other aspect that needs to be discussed. Divide those chores to create a well oiled mechanism or project your working on with your friends.

Whatever it is, remember to work together. Relationships are centered around teamwork. It’s a good thing we all learned that at a young age, right?

Forgiveness

Learn to forgive. Whether the things your forgiving is a bump against a stranger on the street or something larger by someone closer (insert imagination here).

Learn to forgive others of their mistakes as we all make them. No one is perfect and we shouldn’t expect those we are in a relationship to be something we ourselves cannot be.

Effort

Yep, you knew I was going to put this in here, because it’s true. If each person within the relationship doesn’t put in the effort to create the best relationship for all, then the relationship will falter and fail.

I know some who are never happy unless everyone else in the group is happy and that is not what I’m talking about. Each must put in the effort to create a relationship where everyone is happy and no one feels they have to outdo the others to create a welcoming and fun atmosphere.

Understanding

This one is something that a lot of people need to learn. I’ve seen in some relationships where understanding is almost non-existent. (or perhaps those are all the stories I read, oh well, it happens, so let’s continue) While you expect certain things from the other(s) within your relationship, they also expect certain things from you.

One of those things it to be understanding. To be understanding of their feelings, their likes and dislikes, their hobbies and their daily routines. If you can’t understand them on a deeper level, you’re going to have a hard time keeping your relationship where it needs to be.

Respect

One of the most important qualities of a relationship is respect. There is no greater gift than that of respect. Even if it’s with someone you just met, respect can go a long way.

There’s really no more to say than that.

Evolves

With all things, you and your relationships will grow and evolve. As it changes you and those within your relationship will need to change with it. If you can’t do that, it will become very hard to keep your relationships as they are.

Everyone changes and grows and your relationships are no exception. Work with the changes and everything will go just fine.

Final Thoughts

Even though it takes a lot to create, keep and grow relationships. It’s one of the most rewarding things you could ever do.